Thursday, November 7, 2013

The Difficult Question Should I Let My Baby Cry It Out

By Alyce Powell


Traditionally many parents have had no difficulty answering the question should I let my baby cry it out. For many years new parents were taught that if they picked up their new born every time they cried they were spoiling the child. A spoiled child was considered not only a nuisance but also a negative reflection on their parents and family. For this reason the vast majority of infants were left alone till they cried themselves to sleep.

In the past few years a significant trend has began to change those attitudes. Many parents now feel much more confident about making their own decisions. They are not so worried about what their friends or family might say. They also feel that by comforting a distressed infant they will not have a spoiled child on their hands for the rest of their lives.

Once medical factors have been ruled out the parents should pay close attention to the times of the crying. Often keeping a journal is the best way to see if there are patterns forming. A simple notebook is fine. The parents must log down everything that happens. From the moment the child wakes up to the food they eat and even when they nap. Many times parents are amazed to see that the distress follows a clear pattern that they had not been aware of before.

A few of the down sides to co sleeping is that many fathers feel left out. They are also worried about rolling over onto the baby in the night and smothering them. These concerns are totally justified and the final decision should be made together. Mothers who are breast feeding also find it easy to have their child in bed with them. It makes the night time feeds that much easier.

Many of the modern and controversial ideas about child raising are much more connected to the life style of the parents. The movement towards attached parenting is getting a lot more publicity lately. This approach encourages a close bond between parent and child. The idea is that each and every human being has an innate need to be loved, held and made to feel safe. By denying this to an infant they will never be able to form strong bonds with others later in life.

Routines are crucial for both parent and child. Some babies seem to need a lot of sleep, others need less. However, establishing a reasonable bed time is good for everyone. The child should be fed, changed, burped and wrapped up warmly in comfortable clothing. Many people use swaddling as a way to help the infant feel safe and fall asleep.

A good compromise is to have the new born sleep in their crib, but right next to the parents bed. This allows the anxious mother to keep a close eye on her precious child, but at the same time get some much needed sleep. There are some excellent attachments that fit on the side of the bed and allow the infant to sleep safely in their own little space.

There is no one right or wrong answer to the question of should I let my baby cry it out. The best course of action is one that works for the family. The parents should not let the thoughts or comments of others pressure them into doing something they are not comfortable with.




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